Friday, August 27, 2010

It's been a while...

SO, I'm going to get better at doing this more often... Promise!
But, first here's a favor. I wrote this for our high school youth group's page, and would like your opinion on it... Thanks!

Are you in?

"Very well," Deborah said, "I will go with you. But, because of the way you are going about this, the honor will not be yours..." Judges 4:8

People often ask "If it's God's will and it's going to happen anyway, what's the point of Turing/getting involved/doing anything?"
This is what I came up with from the story of Deborah.

We all know the Israelites were the perfect example of how to keep God's commandments and trusted in Him with everything they did, and were thankful for everything they received from the Lord. Wait, not the same people you read about? : )

Well, they were once again up to no good, and so the Lord sold them into the hands of foreigners. These new bosses of the Israelites (Jabian, a king of Canaan) was particularly cruel to them, and for twenty years they slaved away. During this time, the Israelites had Judges who ruled over them, who settled minor disputes between the people. At this time, the head Judge was Deborah. One day, she sent for Barak, and told him " The Lord, the God of Israel, commands you (and he means business, right?) Goo, take with you ten thousand men of Naphtali and Zebulun and lead the way to mount Tabor. I will lure Sisera, the commander of Jabin's army, with his chariots and his troops to the Kishon River and give him into your hands."

Here, God was saying to Barak that He was going to put him in charge of delivering His people from their enemy of TWENTY years! Not only put Barak in charge, but hand them to him on a silver platter. And, Barak was to get all the glory and honor that followed such an act. Imagine the parade that would follow that battle. God made it simple. He gave Barak simple, exact instructions to do God's will, and you know what Barak's response is?

Verse 8 says "Barak said to her "If you go with me, I will go, but if you don't go with me, I won't go."
"Very well," Deborah said, "I will go with you. But, because of the way you are going about this, the honor will not be yours..."

Barak's army was, of course victorious, BUT Barak didn't get the glory. His name wasn't on the record books for delivering Israel from this enemy, but Jael, a random housewife, who actually ended up killing Sisera. Barak missed out on the glory the GOD HAND PICKED HIM TO HAVE. This isn't about getting the glory here on earth, but rather enjoying what God has in store for you. God wants more for you. You just have to get out of the way and let Him lead you to what He has in store for you.

This is what stood out to me: 1) God's will is still going to get done, with or without you. You can't change that. and 2) You can either be apart of it, and get in on this glory from God and doing His will or, you can be in the way, and do what you want and miss out on this parade.

Kind of like when your mom asks you to clean your room. More than likely, it will get done one way or another. You can either whine and complain and moan and still clean your room, taking more time (because hey, whining and complaining and moaning takes time and energy) or you can just clean your room, and make your mom happy, and maybe get to go out for the rest of the night, because you're done cleaning your room.

I don't know about you, but I'm tired of standing on the sidelines and watching other people do His work. I want in on this parade. Are you in?

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

One of those days...

Have you ever had one of those days?
I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, and it's been downhill since then.
Before I can finish one thing, it's off to the next three things, and before you know it, there's 20 things all over the living room waiting to be done. Lunch is late. You just feel like your draging and can't catch up, and then you look up at the clock, and it's 2 hours later than you thought it was. That's when a dirty diaper can almost send you into tears. Just one more thing on the ever-growing "To-Do" list that you can't seem to even make a dent in just the top half.
There are days when I feel utterly and completely useless, and like I've done nothing productive all day, but I'm so tired that I MUST have accomplished SOMETHING, right?

And my poor husband. He does SO much! He helps around the house. He cooks 2-3 times a week. Everytime he leaves the house without me, he offers to take Daniel with him. He is great with Daniel. He just catches most of my frustration on days like this because he's big enough to handle it~ most of the time.

I know this has been a lot of complaining, but I'm hoping that one of you might have a simular day, and know that you are not alone in feeling like this. It happens. We are not perfect. Some days are going to be like this, and it doesn't have to be the whole day! That's the amazing thing about little ones. It's like there is a reset button that is pushed everytime they fall asleep. They wake up, like nothing had happened, and you can get on and enjoy the rest of the day (or the new one).

I'm going to go hit my reset button, and try to relax during the wonderful nap time, and we are going to try again this afternoon...

Thanks for listening! : )

Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Working Mother

Before I even begin, I am a stay at home by choice. This is what I have wanted for ME and MY family for as long as I can remember. My husband and I planned it this way, and we made it so I could be at home with my kids, at least for the time being. I know it is not for everyone. There is NO judgment here. This is not a post saying that one is right and the other is wrong. If there are biases at all, it is simply because I am a stay at home mother, and that is what I know. Just like a mom who has a job couldn't possibly know or understand what it's like to stay at home, I couldn't possibly know or understand what it's like to go to work outside the home.

That out of the way... : )

I love my job. I love everything about it. I love being able to stay at home and take care of my baby (along with a couple others here and there) and take care of my husband. I love it. It is the most rewarding, amazing, wonderful things that I have ever been able to do. It still amazes me that God has blessed ME, little ME, with the responsibility of this miracle of a person to raise and take care of. God has placed in my hands (and my husband's) something that is so unbelievably precious, it is a honor to be responsible for this life. There have just been a couple of things lately that just kind of rub me the wrong way, and since I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one, I thought I'd share... (here we go again... me and my big mouth : )
I have not really experienced this to my face, but I have encountered many friends who have, and I suspect there might be a few people who feel this way, but I just might be super-sensitive... I have a REAL problem with people who say at any point in time that ANY mother (with very few exceptions, none of which I know in person, just on the news) are lazy or any form there of. I think there is a concept of the stay at home mom, who sits on the couch all day and eats the bon-bons, watching day time tv. Give me a break. I know I'm overly sensitive to this, but the idea that I can drop everything and do something for or with someone simply because I "stay at home" comes across as I have nothing better to do. Really? The absolute worst thing that you can say to me right now is that I'm "lazy". I think that might be worse than calling me "fat" or "ugly" to my face. Any stay at home mom will tell you there is a plethora of things that keep us more than busy for the entire day. There might be a downtime occasionally, for a minute, but then it's off to the next thing. And, because you do stay at home, I think there is an expectation that you need to have meal home made every day, and that the house should be perfect every second, because what else do you have to do? I do know Mom's who accomplish this with seemingly ease with plenty of time to spend with their little ones, and I applaud them! Not me, but I'm trying to get better.
There is something that happens to you when you become a mom. You can no longer put yourself first. (This isn't a complaint~ I no longer WANT to put myself first.) Being able to run out the door, or run in and out of a place, or "run" anywhere disappears. The second you start "running" is the second there's a dirty diaper, or a suddenly hungry little one, or some other small crisis that takes another 10-20 minutes to fix. Being able to wake up, roll out of bed, and be somewhere 30 minutes later is no longer a possibility. Eating a hot meal is no longer a possibility. I'm not complaining. I think this has made me grow as a person in ways that nothing else could have. I love to see how far I've come, and how far I'm going to get to go. It is so amazing to see God working in my life and changing me and who I am to become a better person. I have a LONG way to go, and I'm taking baby steps, but I really feel they are in the right direction, and any motion in the right direction is a good thing.
But~ from the time you wake up to the time your head hits the pillow, you're working as a mom. This is any mom. It is not this way if you don't have kids. You eventually have a day to relax, if you choose. Not if you have kids. It is never ending tasks and chores to be done, and the idea that any mom is lazy is just so offensive to me at this point, I'm afraid that I might go off on the person who even implies it. Every mom works so hard, constantly. There is just no way to describe it or understand it, unless you are a mom. Because of this, I think that mom's should stop comparing, judging, gossiping (me included!!!) and just be there for other moms. We have the hardest job in the world, and the only other ones who truly get that are other mom's. We should have a "safe place" in each other where we can go for help and comfort and just venting (in addition to our spouses~ Thanks, Sweetie!)
Not sure where this is coming from; maybe my lack of sleep, maybe other things going on, but that is just my gripe for today... : )

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Enjoying Today

Today is a very special day for many of the people at St. Paul Lutheran Church, so in honor of this special day, I am writing this.

One of the top things that I always hear as advice is "Enjoy your little one now, they grow up so quickly"... I can't tell you how many times that I have heard this, and I try to really take it to heart. I love everyday that I get to spend at home with my little guy, and every day is really a blessing.

So, here are some of my favorite things to do with my little guy, and maybe, just maybe, you can get an idea that you might like, and you can be blessed in a new way with your little one.

1) Take a bath with your little one. Bath, shower, it's all the same, just make sure there's cuddling. Bath time is such a special time for little ones. I watched a show once where a physical therapist (who specializes in working with deaf and dumb children) said that bath time is the best time to teach your children. Something about being in the bath is relaxing and helps them focus. Personally, I love the relaxing. I wasn't much of a bath person, before I had Daniel. After, in those first months, where come 5 or 6 o'clock, they are screaming from just being over stimulated, is about the time that we went into the bath. When he was little, he would kick and swim and wear himself out. It was different than in his little bath. It was nice to just cuddle, and enjoy each other again after him not being happy. We just decompressed, together, and relaxed, and refocused on being together. I can't really explain it. And to some, it sounds weird or time consuming, or whatever, but I'm telling you, don't knock it until you try it. There is a small window to be able to experience this with your children, and it closes way to early in my opinion. So, enjoy it while you can.

2)Grocery Shopping. OK~ so before you think I'm nuts, consider this: how often do you have your little one, practically eye level, with nothing else to look at really other than you? This is a great time to talk to them, and make them focus on you. You get to sing, talk, make faces at, play games with them, all while shopping and having other people in public make weird faces at you (but, hey, who cares about them, right?) Instead of stressing over this, cherish it. Enjoy it. It goes too fast...

3) Walks. Or anything else outside. Something about being outside is just magical in the world of little ones. They love the sunshine. They love everything going on outside. They love the animals, bugs, plants, just life that is outside. This was one of Daniel's first words ~outside~ and I hear it everyday. Maybe this started when he was jaundiced when he was first born, and we worked on his "tan" by taking walks outside? Who knows, but anything outside is ok by him.

4) Anything with the whole family. There is just something that makes everything so much better when Daddy is there, too. Don't forget to drag him along whenever possible. When I take Daniel to places, and then take him back with Daddy and we are all together, it is just always so much more fun. Not sure exactly what it is, just the mood changes for everyone. I love it. I'm sure this is going to be the same when we have more kids, and all of the kids get to come too. There is just something about being a complete family that is really cool.

5) Eating. Another time when you have your little one at eye level, and with only you for entertainment. We are guilty of this, but I am really trying to not let TV or other outside things contaminate this special time. I think there was a real reason that Jesus picked a dinner to show us how to remember Him, and to make it a sacrament. It's not perfect yet in my family, but is getting there.

6) Singing. Just sing. They don't care what you sing, how you sing, or any of that. I remember growing up hinking that my mom should be in the choir because her voice was so pretty. She never was. Point is kids don't care, I promise. Just sing. It's really fun when they start singing back at you... simply amazing.

7) Local free stuff. Every city has festivals, ect. that are free or really cheap to go to especially when it's nice out. Young kids in particular don't really care what they do, as long as it's new. Don't be afraid to try going new places with a baby. Worst case scenario, they cry, it's not fun, and you just come home early. Big deal, right? More often than not, though, they love it, you have a blast, and so do they. Point is, don't be scared to try taking your little ones to new places.
Oh, for ideas on local free stuff, there is a facebook site that is called "Fort Worth on the Cheap" that has awesome postings of local goings on...

8) Reading. I remember tearing up when reading "Oh the places you'll go" to Daniel when he was little. They just love to read. It doesn't matter what~ although, we go for books with much lower word to page ratio's at the moment~ they just love to read books. It's time to cuddle, to learn, to experience new things. Not to mention, this is one of the few times that I get to learn just how extensive Daniel's vocabulary is... I would never know that he knows what an owl is or wolf if it weren't for some very cool books.

9)Sleeping/Napping. Last summer, Daniel was sick with his allergies, and teething, and he was reaching a "touchpoint" when learning to walk all at once. These things all together really started to get to him, so he refused to nap in his crib. If I would put him in there awake, he would cry. If I would put him in there asleep, he would wake up after 30 minutes and cry. But, if I would just let him sleep on me on the couch, he would sleep for 2 hours or longer. Now, I didn't get to get alot of house work done in this time. I didn't get my "me" time, but it was only a couple of months that I got to have my baby sleep on me. It was good, also, because it forced me to take the time to relax, too. I just laid there and read, or whatever else you could do laying on the couch. The laundry waited. It's good about that, it will always be there tomorrow.

10) This one is for you. What do you like to do with your little ones? Take the time to spend with your little one, and figure out some cool stuff to do with them today. I have a friend, whom I admire who does crafts with her daughter every Monday, as has since she was very young, like 12 months old. Kudos to you, because that just wasn't happening over here with my b-o-y. But, they had a blast, and still do... so you get to fill in this blank for you. Have fun!

Enjoy your little ones now, because you never know how long that you get to have them.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Stronger Than

Stronger than my insecurities...
Stronger than my selfishness...
Stronger than my jealousy...
Stronger than my hurtful actions...
Stronger than my snide remarks...
Stronger than my fear...
Stronger than my gossip...
Stronger than my ugliness...
Stronger than my uncertainty...
Stronger than my judgmental glances...
Stronger than my pride...

Is your never ending, perfect, amazing love for me.

Because you died, I am safe.
Because you died, I can giving.
Because you died, I am satisfied.
Because you died, I have open arms.
Because you died, I have soft words.
Because you died, I am brave.
Because you died, I love your children.
Because you died, I am beautiful.
Because you died, I am certain.
Because you died, I smile.
Because you died, I love.

And because you LIVE, I live.

Happy Easter!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010


I wonder... why is it so hard to travel with little ones?
Is traveling really that much of a shock to the system, that they just don't know what to do with themselves?
Maybe, if you are like me, I have my house set up. Little man knows where he can and can not go, and I know how long I have to go and get him before he gets in real trouble when he goes where he isn't sopposed to... I know exactly where he is and what he has (the vast majority of the time) by just the tiny sounds that he makes. This isn't true in a new setting.
I become this hawk, and he my prey. He can't go anywhere, unless I have gone there first. He hears the words "NO, Come back now!" way more than he's used to hearing them. I'm sure this wears on him... like I'm nagging him... maybe good prepreation for later in life??? : )
He doesn't eat. He's in this stage in life where everything is new, and he just got the ability to go and check everything out. Why waste his time eating when he can be exploring new and exciting worlds? And then, he wonders why by the end of the day, he's still fighting sleep, but is just as miserable as can be.
And then, there's night. Every new sound wakes him up. And he's not that great of a sleeper anyway, but in a new environment, hope is lost. I have never been gone for more than 3 nights, and even that was just once or twice, and by the end, I'm just beyond exhausted. Compound this with the fact that I usually travel without my husband, my right hand, and no wonder I don't leave more often.
So, what's a Mom to do? I pack as many snacks as I can that I'll know he'll eat. I pack his favorite toys to keep him distracted from Grandma's favorite (insert something expensive and breakable or eatable) I'm like a boy scout, and come pretty prepared. I do like my packing technique... the day before we leave, everything I use I put in a suitcase. That way, I don't forget anything. I know about not washing the blankets and other sleep things so that they still smell like home. I try to make things as comfortable for him as possible... Short of making him sleep in the pack n play for a couple of weeks before we leave, wich then I'll be exhausted BEFORE we leave, not sure what else we could do. This is another one where I'll leave it up to the other mom's... Any great and revoluionary ways to make travel with your little one better? Find a way to fit your entire house, or just the nursery, in a suitcase? : )

Friday, March 26, 2010

My Son's Birth Day

But Mary kept all these things, and treasured them in her heart. ~ Luke 2:19

There few days as important as the day that you give birth to your child. On that day, your life changes forever. You get to meet one of the people that you love most in the world, one of the people that are going to challenge you and test you like no other person has the power to do. It's a pretty spectatular day. Maybe that is why it is so important to women, it seems more so today than ever before, that every detail of that is special and under their terms, and how they want it.

The day before Daniel was born... wait, let's go back a little further. Just a few weeks into my pregnancy, I had some spotting. It was scary. I had just found out I was pregnant, just told our parents, and we were just getting used to the idea that we were finally going to get to be parents, and then it happens. Before you even meet the baby, feel the baby, you love this child. You love them more than you could ever know, until you are faced with the possibility that you could lose them. This is so minor, looking back, and I knew it was normal to have some spotting inthe begining, but I jsut had a feeling that something just wasn't right. (This feeling becomes a screaming voice in your head the second you get pregnant, by the way) We call the doctor, and they basically give me a list of things that I can and can not do, followed by, "You maybe having a miscarriage, and this early on, there's nothing we can do to help it. It might just happen." YIKES!!! Not really what you want to hear from the person that you are trusting with bringing you and your baby through the next few months safely, with some sort of super human powers...
AND then it hit me. (Well, actually it hit me when I was on the phone with my mother in law who prayed with me over the phone when I was told her what was going on~ pretty cool experience...) This is not in my hands. I have no control over this (outside of not eating sushi, and not drinking my coffee, and taking my pre-natals, ect...) there was nothing I could do to make this pregnancy happen. I couldn't MAKE my baby grow, I could only provide the best environment possible, and the rest was up to God. My 'itty, bitty baby" was in HIS hands. Man, was this just an awesome lesson in just the nick of time!
From then on out, this was God's deal, and I'm along for the ride. The spotting turned out to be no big deal, just found out that I had O neg. blood and got more shots (yippie!!!) and we went right along through the pregnancy...
Well, towards the end of July, about 5 weeks before Daniel was born, and 8 weeks before he was sopposed to be born, I was put on bedrest for pre-eclampsia. Thank goodness for the summer Olymipics that summer, otherwise I might have literaly gone insane! : ) OH, and a loving, kind, caring, super-amazing in everyway husband who waited on me hand and foot and cooked and cleaned and worked the whole time I was on bedrest. He was amazing, and even had to bear the brunt of my occasional craziness when I was on bedrest. (Actually, he bears the brunt of my craziness now~ but different blog! : )
So, the day before I had him, I went in and my blood pressure was up even more, and I had gained 3 pounds (concidering I only gained 10 lbs for the whole pregnancy, 3 in a couple of days was major, aparently), so they did a stress test on me along with a sonogram. I'm not 100%, but from what I can gather, I was having regular contrations without being dialated and only 50% effaced... And when they did the sonogram, he was measuring 9.3 lbs...
After the test, my doctor comes into the room, and says "Well, how about a C~ Section tomorrow" (while we had never really had a firm birth plan, we had discussed the possiblities of the options, and were shooting for a natural (maybe) vaginal birth, like everyone, I believe). These words caught me off guard to be perfectly honest. I'm sure my mouth dropped right open, and I turned white, becuase she started in very quickly "Now,there's a possibility that we'll deliver him tomorrow, and you'll have an 8 lb baby, and the c-section wouldn't have been necessary..." (And I thought, yeah, but he could be 10 lbs, too~ let's do this!)
"But, from what it looks like, I don't want to induce you becuase I don't think you're ready for that, and you're starting to get worse. I think it's time to have this baby. Is this enough time for you?"
I had my bags packed for a couple of weeks already. I was ready. Three weeks early. How did I know???
Well, I went and had all my pre-op done, and spent the next 4 hours on the phone, calling all the grandparents, my husband, other family and friends to announce that we're going to have a baby tomorrow!
Finally, about 1 am I get to sleep. The next morning, I wake up early and get some oatmeal (my surgery wasn't until 3 in the after noon, so I was able to eat until about 6 am, so I woke up and ate!) And tried to go back to sleep for a little bit. Later in the morning, my mother in law made it to our house, as we were putting the finishing touches on our nursery. Earlier in the day, we went and signed our life insurance paperwork, because all of the health testing had been done with me being pregnant, and if I wasn't pregnant anymore, we'd have to do it again, and besides, I was having major surgery, why not make sure I had life insurance? We got home, got the bouncer together, and batteries in the mobile, and went to the hospital. There, my father in law and his wife met us.
I was so glad that Matt's parents were able to be there, because as it turned out, he was really, really nervous. He needed them, and I needed him. It worked out perfectly. It was pretty funny to see just how fast his Dad could run out of the room everytime someone came in to check me, or prep me for surgery : )
It came down to it, and I had an amazing nurse who prepped me. She took amazing care of me, down to giving me a numbing shot in my hand before she placed my IV, not only to make it more comfortable, but to let me know on a small scale what the spinal was going to feel like, to help prepare me. (How cool is that???)
I was scared because they have the Dad's wait out of the surgery room until you have your spinal block and they are basically about to cut. The spinal block was the only part that I was concerned about. Nothing else scared me, and THAT was the part that I couldn't have my husband for??? BOO!!! But, the same amazing nurse was with me, and even noticed how bad my heartburn had gotten, and took care of that for me. You know how some people justhave calming energies? She had that. Again, how cool is that?
Well, I'm all prepped, ready to go, Matt walks in with our camcorder, WHITE AS A SHEET, barely able to talk, but even then, it was awesome just to have him there. Right behind him is my doctor who tells me I look great, everything's set, and here we go! Within minutes after my spinal block, I bet 15 in all, Daniel was born. There is 5 minutes of fottage on our tape before he's born. They have this down to a science. It is precise. It is amazing. Another 30 minutes of what felt like them punching my lungs, and sloshing everything around on the inside, I was stiched up and rolling back to my room with Daneil in my arms. OH, and the cry he made when he was first born~ out of this world amazing. I think I started bonding with him, right then and there, even though I couldn't see him or feel him. We knew we were in the same room. He knew he wanted me. I knew I wanted him, but well, my insides felt like they were outsides, and I was getting fixed up.
And, on a funny note, when they first show you the baby, right before they take him to make sure he's ok, my very first reaction was "You look just like Jessica! (my husband's sister) and my husband thought "You look just like Adam! (my brother)
He was 9lb 5 ozs. He was almost 22 inches. My sweet, beautiful, big boy! Back in the room, I felt some pain, but managable but I was a little shakey. I nursed him, and I was able to have the most amazing (wow~ I know I'm using this word alot, but there's few that are better to describe this) lactation consultant who came in, on her way home on a Friday evening, and sat there patiently, showing me exactly what to do, along with a BUNCH of helpful little hints....See, Amazing! After this, I was really shaky, but again, perfect because there were a bunch of grandparents there who wanted to meet the new little one, so they got a chance to meet their grandson up close while I recovered a bit more from the shock of surgery and got to sit back and ponder everything that had just happened. We had some more dear friends come and visit, and then my mom came. : ) My brother got there just about the same time, and he didn't want to hold Daniel, just touch his little hands. Being able to sit back and see all of the faces, especially of my family, as they met Daniel for the first time was really special. I got to see the love that they have for him, just like I did, the very day he was born. : ) For everything that had happened that day, I was surprisingly alert and not the slightest bit foggy. Even though I had just had surgery, I felt somewhat rested, wich I'm not sure I would have felt that way if I had labor prior to his birth.
I will say, Daniel and I weren't completly bonded right away. When he was born, there wasn't this instantaneous feeling of connection, that frankly I was expecting. I think it was because we were both in survival mode. After something so traumatic to both of our bodies, we just needed to heal. At 4 AM in the morning, after spending all night with him sleeping on my chest, skin to skin, and waking up with him probally every hour, Matt begged for him to go to the nursery. So, after some reluctance on my part, he went, but an hour and half later, he was back! : )
The next day, my Dad and Step-Mom came to visit, and I was moved out of the recovery wing, and onto the maternity ward, and that night, we were bonded. I remember just looking into his eyes and thinking "You're going to be such a great big brother!". Now, I don't know how I knew his personality already. I have always just known, I could tell in the womb how Daniel was going to be. Maybe the way he moved? (And boy, did he MOVE!) I just don't know, but there are things about him now that are coming out, that I knew would. Maybe I inadvertantly encourage these things? But, just that thought of him being a big a brother, and that was it. I started crying, and we've been insepraratble ever since.
Three days after he was born, we came home. I was thrilled to be home, Matt, again, was scared out of his mind. He felt completely unprepared, and probally because I was in charge of the prepreations for Daniel. He didn't know the extent that I had gone to to be ready. I had an excellent nest, he just didn't know it yet! :)
After the first night home with Daniel, Mom told me that she was going home. She had complete faith in Matt and me. He knew he could take care of us, and that we could take care of the baby, and that we needed this time as a family to bond and lean on each other, and she didn't want to get in the way of that. Boy, was she right. The wisdom of this lady sometimes! : ) The first week of Daniel's life was amazing, and just beyond words. The time I was able to spend with Matt, adjusting to our new family, seeing how amazing he was with me, with our son, made me love him even more.
While this may not have been every woman's birth plan, or even the one that I had planned in my head, it was way better than I could have ever hoped. It is one of those days that I will forever "treasure up in my heart".

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Recall of Infantino Baby Sling

I got signed up on the e-mail list for the government agency that does recalls, so that I would be one of the first to know about recalls... So, I'll just pass on this info on here.

Today they recalled a certian type of sling... I would like to note that I love baby slings and the idea of "wearing your baby", but I kinda agree with this particular one. This model seems to go against the reason for "wearing your baby", at least to me, and it looks more like you are just wearing a bag that is designed to carry your baby. Anyway, passing on the info so we can all stay safe!

Me and My Big Mouth

Some things have been on my mind this week, and I think I'll just write a couple of ideas down to see what you guys think...
I know I have a big mouth. I like to think that it's because I'm an open book, you always know what I'm about and what I think. There's no mystery here. I kinda like that...
Well, I know that this is not always the best policy. I know that I sometimes offend with my big mouth, or that I come accross pretty poorly. Almost always, I have good intentions but you know what they say about those.
I'm just kind of awkward socially, and you have to get me to really like me, and not everyone gets me. I'm not saying that everyone has to like me.
I don't know. This started in Sunday School when they were talking about keeping your marriage sacred by not sharing everything with everyone in order to build trust between spouses. I totally see this. I totally hope that I don't embarrass my husband when we are out, or when I tell people things... I try to let others learn from me and my experience, but it doesn't always work out that way. And this is the best scenario as to why I would be telling things that I shouldn't be saying.
So, I guess what I would like to know is how much is too much? How do you know what to say and what not to say? What is your standard for not stepping on toes?
Do you just not care, and stomp away, or do you end up falling over yourself trying to dodge all the ever growing toes in our society?
How do you teach your children what to say and not to say?
Just some thoughts...

Monday, March 22, 2010


I hate doctors for making us feel that we HAVE to have them RIGHT now, or our babies will die a horrible death of diseases that have been treated successfully for years now, but then they tell you in the next breath "Well, if you really want to wait, it's ok, I guess, it's really just up to you." I hate activist groups for making me feel that if I DO give my baby shots, he'll get autism, and live an awful life, and I'm an awful mother for allowing such chemicals into my baby~ not to mention all of the cruel and inhumane ways they come up with the shots in the first place...
Doctors~ You went to medical school. You know SO much more about my baby's insides and how they work and about the shots and how they affect the system than I do. That being said, I stay at home with my little guy, he's got limited exposure to the outside world, and I'm ok with giving him shots~ just in my OWN time. Besides that, I KNOW him better than you do, so trust me when I say anything over 2 shots at a time is too much!!! There's no rush to give him the 30+ shots in the first two years!!! Can't we spread this out just a little bit? I'm a very attached parent, who freaks over every runny nose, every spot, so, I promise to stay on top of his symptoms if he happens to come down with say, the measles, so that you can treat him early, I promise!!! And if I only want 2 shots at every visit, so that our next few days (yes, I said DAYS, because it does take THAT long for my little guy to get over shots) are better, then LET me COME BACK in a couple of weeks to get the other two shots!!! My insurance pays for it, again, I promise!!! I checked!!! (I'm lucky in this department~ if they didn't I wouldn't have a problem taking him to the health department~ especially since Doctors LOSE money on vaccinations anyway!!!)
Activist Groups~ How dare you put these doubts in our heads with such LITTLE research!!! You have NO IDEA what you are talking about (at least according to the doctors, and they have the degree to back them up...) I have read Dr.Sears, and I have looked into the "links" and the possible side effects that each shot MAY cause my little guy. The percentages are SO LOW to cause such a public uproar!!! That being said, if you ARE one of the small percentage, my heart goes out to you. How awful! I can't imagine. I just simply can't. What a high gamble, even if the percentages are low, but if you are the one in the million, that is too high.

Bottom line, there HAS to be MORE RESEARCH for shots in children. There just simply hasn't been enough to determine how to eliminate that final small percentage of serious side effects. There are good things about having your children immunized. Very good things. There just has to be LESS RISK, even better NO RISK for parents to feel better about giving their child SO MANY shots in the first two years of life. There has to be a better way!!! That is what I am praying for~ a better way to keep our little ones healthy.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Enjoying every moment

Today there are alot of different things going on in my mind, so this may be a little scatter brained... : )
I have read too many times in other blogs about parents "regretting not spending more time with their kids" or regretting not "appreciating the time that you do have with them more." There is time and time again that I hear that time goes by so quickly when it comes to little ones, and that if you don't really stop and smell the roses, so to speak, and do it often, it's gone.
If you can't stop doing the dishes or laundry long enough to play with your child, something is out of whack. I may not always have the cleanest house, but I have tried to actually stop and actually spend time with Daniel. This is not an always thing (like it should be). This doesn't always happen everyday. But, I do try to reconize the moments that he just wants a hug, or to be held for just a moment to see what I am up to, or to just play or dance with me for a minute. Especially when they are little, their attention span is so small, that they are on to the next thing so quickly, and you can be back to the dishes, or laundry, or dinner in no time flat.
This takes practice, too. It can't neccessarily be scheduled.
"All right, I can pencil you in for a hug between lunch and nap, how does 12:45 sound to you?"
It happens when a certian song comes on the radio or the tv... or a certian smell of something baking... It's feelings.
The house will get clean... someday. The jeans can be washed tomorrow. The dishes can sit just a couple more hours, there's no real harm. The baby will not stop growing. The baby will not be there forever. Life doesn't stop happening so that you can clean the toliet.
Believe me, this is just as much for me, as a reminder, than for anyone else. There are so many times that I can't wait for naptime or bedtime so I can just get this one thing done... But, in the long run, what matters? Clean dishes, or the love that you are able to show to your litttle one? Or the memories of dancing in the living room together, before they could even walk?
Here is hoping that there are many more memories to come and to cherish!

Thursday, March 4, 2010


What is it about being a mom that makes you instantaneously a Purex carrying, Lysol spraying, snot nose fearing crazy woman? I understand about not wanting your little one to get sick (because, who wants to see their little one miserable?) But, when it goes to the next level of blaming someone for giving you the germs (GUILTY!!!!) and cursing them under your breath as your holding your little one crying in the middle of the night, it's gone a little too far.
We go over board with questions... "Is the snot clear, yellow, or green? Thick or thin? How many times has he coughed in the past day? Hour? Well, what have you been giving him? Does he have fever? Oh, no, sweetie, don't touch that! Get that out of your mouth! Oh, you say you were sick 3 months ago... we better wait one more month to come over."
I am guilty of all of these statements. They are taken straight out of my vocabulary. I'm somewhat of a medical junkie, which make me know just enough to be dangerous. I don't know as much as I would like to say I do. Growing up, my family, not in a nice way, would call me "Dr. Beth" because I would try to fix everything. Did I mention that for fun growing up, I would read my mother's medical dictionary? Yes, I'm a nerd, I know. My mother reminded me right around the time that my little guy was born that I did NOT have a medical degree hanging on my wall, and since the pedi does, I should let them do their job. She was right.
That being said, I do think there is something to be said for a mother's intuition. A doctor only knows what you tell them. They can only go off your cues and your baby's (which are really hard to read when you're not with them 24-7, and even then, it can be impossible to tell what is wrong.) I never understood the Mother's intuition thing until I had my son, and then did it ever come out! My husband thought I was stubborn before, but get in the way of something that I think is right for my son, and be prepared to get knocked down! If I feel a doctor isn't paying attention to what I am saying, and not fixing a problem; on to the next one.
I would say I'm the middle of the road germaphobe. There are some, like my brother and sister who lived with us for sometime last year who would disagree. Every time they would come into the house with sniffles, there I was with the Lysol ready, spraying everything behind them all the way to their bedroom door. I treated the common cold as the plague. I was all of the sudden someone in "Outbreak" (by the way... anyone know how you can get one of those cool germ suits???) On the other hand, I admit to giving my son his passy after it has fallen on the floor... in public. So where's the sense in that?
I know, it's craziness. But hey, if that's the only (or one of the few) places it comes out, we're doing ok, right?

Sorry if this one seems all over the place... I'm distracted by all the things that need to be lysoled in the house! : )

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Daniel Loves

Daniel loves:
To sing his Sunday school songs,
To say AMEN really loud in the middle of prayers,
To sleep with his blanket, blanket bear, and the shirt I wore that day
To name everyone in the pictures I have hanging in my hallway
To watch the movie "Babe" and name all the animals that show up on the screen
To put the remote in my hand and yell "PIG PIG PIG!!!!" to get to watch "Babe"
To read Daddy's sports magazines, just to find the balls
To play with the neighbor kids his age
To climb in and out of his high chair~ by himself
To eat anything SWEET
To go anywhere, anytime, as long as he's going
To make me happy

: )

Funny Stories

So, per a request from my sister... a funny story!
One lazy evening, pretty soon after Daniel learned to walk, the whole family (my brother, sister, husband, and I) were all sitting around enjoying relaxing. I don't remember what we were watching, but the "Safety Dance" came on, and Daniel just started dancing. He would bounce up and down, turn around, wave his hands... all with his cute little diaper bottom!!! We all cracked up, so much so that I googled it, and we all danced to the lyrics "You can dance if you want to" until we dropped. It was just ironic that the first real time that he danced was to this song! So much fun! Gotta love the baby booty dance! : )


Someday, I'd love to do this full time. But, for now, you can enjoy my playing around with my son : )

Whoever said "sleep like a baby" didn't have a baby!!!

I have come to the conclusion that some things just are better left unsaid. And somethings, like "Your baby won't sleep through the night, ever." should totally be said before you have a baby! This post isn't really for the mothers who have problems with their babies sleeping. If your baby sleeps soundly all night long, and wakes up happy the next morning with birds singing and the Disney music in the background... good for you! That's awesome, and I applaud you!
This is for the mommies who are up every two hours with their little ones who insist on feeding constantly. Who spend endless nights on the couch, holding them, trying to get some rest, and can't wait for the sun to come up, because it's just crazy to start the coffee pot before then, right?
Every baby is different. Every Mommy is different. Every Mom also has a list of needs, i.e. I need a HOT shower every couple of days, it is MY time to relax. I also need a soft bed. Coffee every so often is nice, too. So, armed with my coffee and knowledge of when my next nice, hot shower is coming, I can take on the constant barrage that staying home with little ones brings. This brings me to my theory: If sleep is important for the mom, the baby will sleep better. (Probably because the mom is more proactive about making it a priority, which is totally good.) If you are ok and can function with a couple of nights without sleep (like me, but two really is my all time max) then, your little one might not be such a good sleeper. Don't know if this God's selection of not giving you more than you can handle (which might have some part of it, maybe) but, I'm leaning more towards that it is possible to "train" your baby to sleep better~ you just have to be willing to do it. I, am not!!!
Let me just say that I can not handle crying it out. It didn't work for me or my son. The couple of times that I would try at nap, if he would fall asleep eventually, he would wake up early from the nap, and wake up MAD. He would cry for the rest of the day, worse than shot days. It did not work for us. And there were times when I felt so alone in this struggle, as everyone of my Mom friends had success with crying it out.
I had a friend recommend a book to me... "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. I highly recommend it, if nothing else, as a way of making yourself not feel so bad for not being "strong enough" to let your little one cry and cry and cry(yes, at 3 am, you can feel this way). I'm glad that crying it out works for some. I've heard miracle stories. Again, this is for the mom's for whom it doesn't.
This is one of the things that sometimes made me feel like less of a mom. I would think "Why can't I get a baby to sleep?" So, I hear all you sleepless moms out there. You are not alone! : )

Tips that I have found that really help, without tears!!!

1) Establish a bedtime routine. This is important to start as early as 3 months (if not earlier), and expect it to change as your little one does. It could change order, change times, ect., but when it works one night, follow until it doesn't anymore. And, you can always go back to old routines and try them again!
2) Adjust dinner time. Some little ones like dinner right before bed. Some like it a couple of hours before. Some mommies like dinner right before bath, because it makes for easy clean up (guilty!!!). Try adjusting it to see witch one works for you, and again, this may change!
3) I have started putting the shirt that I wear all day in the crib with Daniel at night. He is 18 months old now, so I'm more comfortable about having a loose material in his crib. He loves it, and cuddles up with it. And, he has been sleeping better with it. If you have a smaller one, try sleeping with snuggies, ect., and switching out every other night. The stronger the smell on the shirt (I know, ewww, but they love it, and hey, it doesn't have to be a bad smell!!!) the better.
4)Be certain of the temp in the baby's room. Last summer, we found out we had the vent closed in Daniel's room, because during the winter, the heater would make it too hot. Then, summer came, and no cool air was getting into his room. Ooops... But, easy fix!
5) Try white noise. This can be a sound machine (FYI, in my experience, (again, every kid is different) nature sounds don't work as well as water or just music.)which can get to be pretty pricey. This can also be as simple as a fan. Make sure that it isn't too loud, though.
6) NAPS!!! AS weird as it sounds, if you have a bad nap, expect a bad night. If your little one gets too tired to sleep, well, they are too tired to sleep. The overtired baby is an awful thing, and is not fun for the Mom, but it doesn't last long, promise!!! Make sure you accommodate for good naps, (even though they might not happen everyday) and it will make your nights better. I put up sun blocking curtains in Daniel's room (i.e. his comforter) and made it dark as possible. (There are different theories about this, but it has worked for me.) I also try to keep as quiet as possible for the first 10-30 minutes, so that he gets in his deep sleep, then I'm pretty much able to do most things.

Hope these help, and if you have tips of your own, please share, because we could all use them!

Here's to a good night's rest!

Monday, March 1, 2010

Finally starting this!!!

Well, after reading many other friend's and other mommy blogs... I thought there might be something that I could add to the mix! : )
I am a mother of Daniel, who is 18 months and is just amazing! I love him with all my heart... and mainly because he reminds me of his Daddy, who I also love with all my heart.
I guess I should start at the beginning...
I met my husband in high school. We've been dating ever since, and I think we may have had one good real fight in our whole 10+ years now of dating. I love him with everything I've got. He takes such good care of me and now our son, I am SO blessed by him!
Well, after 6 years of dating, we get married. It was amazing, and one of the best days of my life. : ) (with many more to follow, thanks to my wonderful husband!) Everyone told my mom how happy I looked at the wedding, and that was an awesome compliment! Looking back at the pictures (isn't it funny how there is ALWAYS someone taking your picture on your wedding day???) there isn't a one where I'm not smiling. Like I said, one of the best days of my life!
Fast forward 4 more years, and we have a baby... a wonderful, loving, cuddly, BEAUTIFUL (if I do say so myself!: ) Baby Boy! I am a very happy stay at home momma trying to figure out how she can stay at home for the rest of her life! : )
I've read ALOT of parenting books... I've had lots of experience with little ones, but I've only been a mommy for 18 months as of today, so I know I've got ALOT to learn! I'm trusting for guidance from God, family, and friends... not to mention the ever so wonderful "mommy network" as I call it! I'm the kind that loves input. I may not always take the advice, but I do remember it, promise Mom and Dad! ; )
I hope for this to help you connect more with a Mommy Network of your own... but I'll be willing to bet money that this will help me more than anyone else!